Life is so different from an exam; I always wonder, is there a correct answer? Who decides what is correct ? Is there more than one correct answer ? Sometimes, I get into this phase of asking too many questions to myself and end up with no convincing answers. Sometimes, I wish I were back in middle - school; life was so simple then. Those days were always carefree and fun. Why does life complicate as we grow older ?Or is it us who make it complicated ?
This sudden philosophical phase was triggered by the fact that it is my 2nd month wedding anniversary today. I am feeling low. Just one of those days when I feel like leaving everything here and hop into the next plane. If only it was that simple....Sigh :-(
This leads to my point about choices and living with it. I chose to come here for studies. I chose to pursue my second masters. I chose to get married knowing very well that we will have to be away for a while. So, when I made all these choices, why should I feel bad ? I should not be complaining ! This is what I wanted ! And yet...there is something wrong somewhere. I guess, it is not possible to have everything in life.
The easiest solution would be to ditch my studies; what is the point in doing astronomy when I know I may never work in this field ? Yes, I love the subject enough to come this far; sadly I may not get the jobs that I have in mind with just a Masters degree. So, I've to go back to telecom for a job. I like being a telecom engineer too. But, I have to choose one field now. Maybe later in life, I will continue my pursuit in astronomy. Does it give me enough reason to quit ? I know this is just a moment and tomorrow I will be ready to fight my battles again. I can never quit having come this far. And although I may be happy initially if I quit, deep inside it would drive me nuts. Better sustain for a few more months and get done with it.
I know its just a matter of time and everything will be better. But till then, I will have these sudden urges to hop onto a plane and fly to Vikram. Everything has its good side; so this is good side of having long complicated procedures for visas and the fact that students are mostly too broke to afford tickets at the drop of a hat.
So, the answer is, I choose to finish what I started.
This sudden philosophical phase was triggered by the fact that it is my 2nd month wedding anniversary today. I am feeling low. Just one of those days when I feel like leaving everything here and hop into the next plane. If only it was that simple....Sigh :-(
This leads to my point about choices and living with it. I chose to come here for studies. I chose to pursue my second masters. I chose to get married knowing very well that we will have to be away for a while. So, when I made all these choices, why should I feel bad ? I should not be complaining ! This is what I wanted ! And yet...there is something wrong somewhere. I guess, it is not possible to have everything in life.
The easiest solution would be to ditch my studies; what is the point in doing astronomy when I know I may never work in this field ? Yes, I love the subject enough to come this far; sadly I may not get the jobs that I have in mind with just a Masters degree. So, I've to go back to telecom for a job. I like being a telecom engineer too. But, I have to choose one field now. Maybe later in life, I will continue my pursuit in astronomy. Does it give me enough reason to quit ? I know this is just a moment and tomorrow I will be ready to fight my battles again. I can never quit having come this far. And although I may be happy initially if I quit, deep inside it would drive me nuts. Better sustain for a few more months and get done with it.
I know its just a matter of time and everything will be better. But till then, I will have these sudden urges to hop onto a plane and fly to Vikram. Everything has its good side; so this is good side of having long complicated procedures for visas and the fact that students are mostly too broke to afford tickets at the drop of a hat.
So, the answer is, I choose to finish what I started.
16 comments:
Hey Shilpa, Sure there are such times in life, and as you said, you are sound in mind to not follow thoughts.
Take it easy. Its just a matter of a few days.
And WOW! Astronomy?! That sounds like a cool area to specialize in! :)
Rahul,
It was just that moment u know...me all confused...a few minutes after writing the post; I was back to normal (if u call that normal :-P)
Thanks...!
SK,
Thanks !
Yeah the problem with Astronomy and Astro-physics is that its too cool and too narrow a field for jobs :-(
Madsies,
Its good to know that I am not the only one who goes thro this "thinking phase". :-)
Thanks !
Yeah I like it short too...its amazing how the lenght of your hair can make you look sooo different...and add color to it...and u can have a lot of experimenting !!
Good Luck for coloring ur hair...all I can say is avoid bright red :-P
Heyyyyy
Where are the pictures?!!
SK,
Its the old pics yaar..remember my old post on expts with hair color ? That had a link...I will post new pics soon..
Buddy! I am glad that you have put on the thinking hat - as too much thinking leads to confusion, confusion leads to urge to know, urge to know leads to the RIGHT ANSWER! Do u feel like killing me, never mind - I am glad you have taken the decision which is best for you...Let me tell you, you are doing just great in life!
Hey, I guess I am kinda late in jumping into the "cheer-up" bandwagon. In any case, better late than never. So, cheer up :-)!
Its only some more time na. As you say you cannot be completely happy till you meet your own goals too. So plod on, girl - the happy ending is in sight :-).
p.s. Prasanna, whatever little hair I have on my head threatened to jump out after reading your logical analysis :-(!
Prasanna,
Ur logic is very amazing...!
Thanks anyways :-)
I did realise my life is not as confusing as the funda given by u hehehe
Archu,
Thanks for cheering me up...!
Shilpa, good that you are back to normal. But still a piece of advice..
Work hard for your dreams, and don't quit and do not make any assumptions about what you can do with an Astronomy masters ... It is worth the effort!
Incidently, I am also here to do a second masters in Electronics after a tryst with telecom s/w which I like but dont love. And we know how much difference that makes.
aw shilpa, frustrations are part of it. Take a nice bubble bath [I seem to be prescribing this a lot these days!] and tomorrow, you will be seeing your life differently.
Astronomy eh?! cool.
2 masters in 2 different subjects, sounds familiar, and then we follow what's destined for us. :-)
Archana,
You are so right; the difference between love and like does indeed make a big difference.
Rads,
Follow destiny eh ? I wonder what the "stars" have in store for me :-)
finish what u started?
u mean the blog :-P
so does this have a sequel..;-)
wutz with star gazing..:-)
Yuhoooooooooooooooooo welcome to the 'Human Race'.
Sometime you can’t avoid receiving blows from fate in the battle of life. But you can always relax for some time and sharpen your over blunt sword and jump again into the battle field. Full marks for your answer “I choose to finish what I started.”
I didn’t want go so philosophical but I couldn’t stop……
new template? looks coooooool :)
"Or is it us who make it complicated ?" YES.!!
Gingko,
You r a genius ! I cannot argue with u ..
Shekar,
I am getting to hear all kinds of funda...! btw hows marriage preps ?
Vijay,
:-) Thanks
I guess sometimes it is good to follow the KISS funda - ' Keep It Simple Stupid' :-)
if u r gonna compare life to exams.. then its more like this.. the next question wud depend on the answer for the current question sirt of.. and it only gets complicated.. like levels in a game perhaps..
Vivek,
Thats an interesting thought !
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